Hudson Taylor, son of a chemist who was also a Methodist preacher in a mining
town, fell in love with a young music teacher while still in his teens. He wrote to
his sister, "I know I love her. To go to China without her would make the world
a blank." She thought his desire to go to China absurd, and did not plan to go.
In process of time, it was understood they would be married. Each planning
to change the others mind. Neither won. Her refusal made Hudson heartbroken,
but he was comforted in the love of God. He could not get over her, and in 1853
he asked again for her hand in marriage, which she accepted in spite of her
unsuitability for Gods plan. Her father later settled the matter, refusing for her
to go to China.
Hudson left for China on September 19, 1853. He was not long in Shanghai before
he became lonely, miserable and homesick. He longed for a wife. He wrote to his
sister to relay any news of Miss Vaughan, no news was ever fruitful for his predicament.
In his loneliness, his thoughts turned to another woman he knew in, Elizabeth
Sisson. Through process of time, this venture proved to be heartbreaking as well. Her
father likewise would only permit the marriage if he came back to England. Hudson
contemplated returning to England, but this put a "blight" on his prayer life. (Thankfully
he did not!)
A missionary lady in whom Hudson had confided mentioned Maria Dyer, who was
working at a mission school. He remembered her as "a good looking girl, despite
the slightest cast in her eye". She had a reputation of being devoted to her calling,
and had turned down 2 other suitors. During the next few months he began having
strange feelings for Maria, unlike he'd had for Miss Vaughn or Elizabeth. After many
months and events along the way, Hudson Taylor and Maria Dyer were married on
January 20, 1858.
If you read this story in depth it is pretty amazing. His own loneliness and desire could have very well caused him to leave China and destroy the entire work.Many souls would/could have been lost, through his choice to follow his own will (emotions) rather than follow God's will. This story is just one way in which we can get so caught up in our idea of God's will. There are so many different scenarios we could put here. It seems very often in life once we reach one stage of life, we are very quick to set our eyes on the next 'goal' and want that now! Most people are truly never satisfied, always wanting the next big thing, which once obtained that is not enough either.
I know what I want but IS it GOD'S will? How do we know if what we want is God's will? This is not really a hard question, it is just a hard answer to receive I think.First, the Bible is our source for determining God's will. If any area of what you want violates ANY part of scripture, then it's not God's will. Secondly, if in your mind it doesn't violate any part of scripture, then go to you Pastor/Preacher or someone who is more spiritual than you are and ask their opinion. Many times though we just choose to overlook what the Bible says, because really it won't be THAT bad! I have had ideas and plans that I hoped was God's will, but in some way or another they violated God's Word. I even attempted to try to overlook them, but I am oh so thankful that by the grace of God I was not able to follow through with what I wanted. I can see the outline of God's hand in my life, and His salvation of keeping me in His will. So what is His will for me? It really isn't a big mystery. It simply is to keep serving where I am, until He changes my course. I have heard so many suggestion about where I should find God's will. I have not lost God's will, nor do I need to find it, I am in His will for me now. I feel such contentment and peace in where I serve and am, I have my desires, but they have not fit into God's will right now. Yes, those emotions sometimes make me want to be spontaneous, or make my spirit troubled; but I try my best to quickly get my Bible. Sometimes I will ask my Mom, "Can you pray a little harder for me today/tonight?" Then she knows those emotions are battling inside. This is really a good verse in those times. "But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not in us." 2 Corinthians 4:7 Those times when I want what I want, and am tempted to destroy God's will for me, I remember it's not of my own power that I can win, but His alone. It is definitely no glory of my own that I am in God's will, but it is in His power alone. It is in His power that I find strength to help in time of need.To God be all the glory!
Maybe you are struggling with IS this God's will? I encourage you to get into your Bible, ask God to show you the answer, but you must be willing to accept whatever the answer is. If you still aren't sure, ask someone more spiritual than you are. Maybe you know what God's will is, and you are just struggling with His answer. My answer is still the same, find your Bible. Certainly the Great Comforter, can comfort your heart too!
I am SO thankful today that even in my 'young' life, I can see salvation for His will! I am reminded almost daily how different my life could be, had I been allowed or able to follow through with some of my wants. More than anything I want to please God, and to be IN His will. He is so good, and so worthy of my entire life.
"Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is."
"In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."
I Thessalonians 5:18